I’ve always been a private person. But in my late twenties, I began to realize that privacy had also become a form of self-erasure. I had learned to make myself small, to people-please, and to keep much of my inner life hidden.
In 2023, during an excruciating dark night of the soul, I started recording myself speaking to a camera (on my phone). What started as a personal practice became a way to clarify my thoughts, articulate what was happening within me, and grow more comfortable expressing myself honestly.
Most of these video journals will never be published. That is part of their value. They are created privately, without performance or audience in mind.
But occasionally, while watching them back, I find something that feels true enough, human enough to share.